23+4 and Holding Strong?

I am, well, baffled. This week last time around is when the shit hit the fan. I went into preterm labor and my cervical length began its great descend to nothingness. So when I arrived at my appointment yesterday I was pretty nervous.

I was hoping for my favorite U/S tech, but decided I would be happy with anyone other than the one I had last week. I got a woman I never met before. She was super confident, super fast and super efficient. I watched images of the girl flash on the screen. Head, body, kidney blood flow (yeah, looks like she has 2:) She is weighing in at 1lb 10 ounces already. Nice. Then onto the old cerv.

I watched the first measurement come up. I was expecting a number to toss me in the "scary yet still gray area" because that is how I roll. The numbers pop up in the lower right of the screen and I can't even always see the whole thing. But wouldn't you know: 3.9. What? I am holding strong? What? Me? I am totally baffled at this point. After the tech left the room, I balled. Relief, and continued fear.

I did start feeling an uptick in contractions this week, but nothing alarming. I guess the progesterone really is doing the trick. And this week will begin to tell us what happened last time around. I am starting to think the it was the PTL all along that started the ball rolling, not IC. Only time will tell.

But I can not ignore the pessimist in me who thinks: well, my dates could be off. Next week could be the bad week. And I don't have an U/S for 2 weeks, though I do see my OB next week. I forgot what this living week to week thing was like. Hoping to just make it one more. I remember thinking: if I can just get to 28 weeks, if I can just get to 30 weeks, if I can just get to 32 weeks-- then I'll feel ok, safe. But you never do till you get within a few weeks of term, do you?

22+2 with 2/10 cm loss

So my cervix went from 3.9 to 3.7. The u/s tech seemed a little lost. I watched her try to measure my length over and over. She didn't really seem to know what she was doing. So I am chalking up the very minor dip to her shaky hand.

I see my OB on friday for a spec and manual check. Then back for another u/s next friday at 23+4. The very same gestational where my cervix bailed last time. Could be interesting!

I am doing a terrible job of documenting my pregnancy. With D. I took pictures all the time. Here is the first one I took so far!

Love! Joy!

Little Boy Hank arrived yesterday. The son of one of my most favored blogger and real world friends. Go say a HUGE and much awaited congrats to G$ at Makes You Stronger! She will be one of the most glorious Mama's ever!

Not much to report from me. We just arrived home from a week at the beach. My garden is a disaster. Seems my tomatoes have contracted a fatal in incurable fungus. I am a gardening failure. My ego, as it pertains to keeping things alive, didn't really need a blow at this very moment. Whatever.

I have an U/S to check on my cervix and stitch tomorrow. I am just about 22 weeks, so I am anticipating there could be a little change this week, but hoping not. I have been having occasional very slight spotting. Really, just barely a bit of pink. I'll mention it to my Peri. I have also had a little spotting following exams (speculum and trans-vag u/s.) But I suppose that is pretty normal.

1 day short of half way

We make it to 20 weeks tomorrow: the famed and somewhat dreaded midway mark. It is from now till 28 weeks that I find the most terrifying. It is the window of cervical misbehaving. For now, I am holding strong at 3.9cm. But last time around it dropped at 23 weeks, and it went fast. I just keep telling myself... that is what the stitch is for...

DH gave me the P17 shot for the first time this week. I am on my third week of it and it seems to be doing the right thing. Haven't felt any contractions yet. He did a good job with the needle. Just the smallest of bruises. I actually suspect he really likes doing it.

We head to the beach for a week on Saturday, which is both exciting and scary. I love the sea, but being 2 hours from my OB and Peri will certainly cause me some stress. I saw the peri 4 days ago and see my OB tomorrow. So really, it will be less than a 2 week interval, but the longest I have gone without a check the entire pregnancy.

Been a tough week at home. The boy has been really sick. It started with hives all over his face and limbs on Wednesday. By Saturday morning it was a runny poo fest. Poor thing. His bedsheets have been changed more this week than in a lifetime. I still feel like I am up to my elbows in sh*t. Parenting is gross. But I think he is turning a corner. He is lethargic with a low grade fever today. I think the illness is finally breaking. I hope.