35 weeks

Everything continues to be pretty uneventful. I saw my OB yesterday. Everything there is cool. My contractions are pretty non-existent. Baby is very active, more-so than I prefer;) Sleep is scant and life is generally good.

We are in the process of lining up a volunteer doula to see us through the birth. There is a great organization in my city that provides doulas-in-training to those who can not afford to hire one. So the doula gets to experience a birth and practice their skills and we get another person in the room to lean on. It is a pretty good deal.

During my son's birth I ended up with an epidural somewhere around 7-8 cm. It was mostly because I was vomiting like crazy. Contract, vomit, contract, vomit. I couldn't get a handle on it, and I couldn't breath. So I am going to talk to my OB to see if I can have some z.o.f.r.a.n, or the like, to try to prevent the barfing before it start and possibly spare me the epidural. I had a vaginal birth anyhow-- which I am very grateful for-- but I would love to do it unmedicated this time. We'll see. What will be will be. I am not the type to get upset about my birth experience as long as everyone is safe in the end. Oh, but I'd also like to skip the episiotomy this time. It sure sped things up, but made the healing harder.

I am scheduled to have my stitch removed on Nov 3rd. I was told I *may* have some cramping and discomfort with that. I hope it goes smoothly. I'll be 37 + 2, and thinking I'll last another 2 weeks. I delivered my son at 39 and hope for the same with this one.

Dang this blog is boring. Boring is good. If you need excitement, you'll have to back up nearly 2 years to the day. This pregnancy has just been so different. In a good way.

A lonely spill.

We are 33 weeks tomorrow. Incredible really. I have no restrictions! I am even allowed to have sex (but don't tell my DH that;) As a result I am probably pressing my luck a bit. I have been a maniac - cleaning, painting, cooking, lifting, etc. My mom was here for the weekend helping me sew a new slip cover for our wretchedly old and gross couch. I pushed it.

DH is out of town for nearly two weeks, so after my mom's visit I was exhausted. My back ached from sewing and cooking all weekend. I was just zonked. The boy went to bed easy and I headed downstairs to catch up on my TV programs. As I reached the bottom of the steps I biffed it. My socked feet slipped from under me and I bumped down the remaining three stairs on ass and hands. It wasn't a bad fall, but enough to shake me up. I sat there for a minute, all pathetic-like and cried a little. What else is a girl to do?

I woke up this morning with a pink coloration to my normal discharge (sorry if TMI.) It is not that uncommon for me, especially after a BM (again, sorry if TMI.) I think my stitch just gets a little irritated. I am just keeping an eye on it and ready to call my OB if it worsens. I also called my the MIL to come get the boy for the day so I can just rest.

I fell in my last pregnancy. I guess it is pretty normal. Just you just feel so stupid, and pathetic, and stupid. Ugh.

Here to one more week. Soon I'll be scheduling the removal of my stitch! I can't believe it.

Hello world & it is all still so muddy.

Everything is calm here on the pregnancy front. I am approaching 29 weeks and still standing!

And while, don't get me wrong, I am so grateful to be up and about, the last few weeks have thrown my diagnosis into muddy territory. Last time around I started contracting around 20 weeks. Those contractions, while sometimes regular, were rarely painful. My cervix shortened dramatically at 23.5 weeks and I was hospitalized.

The assumption has always been that I have incompetent cervix (IC) and Preterm Labor (PTL). But with a preventative cerclage and weekly progesterone shots, I seem to be avoiding both-- to a certain extent. I do have runs of contractions, which are really just a reminder to drink water and rest. They never get real regular and are only occassionally strong enough to make me uncomfortable. And as for the shortening, I dipped from 3.9 to 2.7 at 25 weeks-- but it has held up since then. So what do I have?

I guess in the end it doesn't really matter. What matters is that I am still pregnant and still able to chase my awesome little toddler around. But I am frustrated with the fact that this muddy diagnosis continues to fail to convince the stupid insurance company that these measures are necessary to keep me safely pregnant. There is no code for. "generally misbehaving cervix." That seems to be the best way to describe what I have.

Whatever. Wish me luck in the homestretch. Things could still get hairy, but I feel better everyday about how far along we have already come;)

27+3 - all is good.

It has been 2 weeks since my cervical length dropped and I spent the day in triage. It has been really quiet. Not that my cervix would grace me with a PSA on its activities...

I had my last u/s at the 2 week interval. I don't go back for a month. Amazingly, I measure 3.0! I am just in shock and feel like I just won my freedom! I know I still have to take it easy, and the shit could still hit the fan, but I think the chances are quite good that I may stand up for this whole pregnancy. It really just means that I am going to have to buy some fall/winter maternity cloths that aren't sweats;) Kind of a bummer since we are on a tight budget, but whatever.

I might just be one of the luckiest ladies on the planet. So. Freaking. Awesome.

Holding...

Back at triage just briefly today to get my second round of steroids. What a difference. Yesterday's nurse came at me with that needle like she was in a fencing match. She never swabbed my arse with alcohol, she gave no warning. It hurt like hell.

Today's nurse rocked. I don't know what she did. It was like she was tapping my butt the whole time and she had me take two deep breaths. I never even realized the needle went in. All the sudden... Done. Some nurses are just super awesome at what they do. She was and I told her so.

Anyhow. A shot, a half hour on the monitor and I was out of there. Still having small runs of contractions. Nighttime seems to be the worst-- probably because of hydration.

Anyhow, here is a pic of my old friends. How I dread these damn machines. And do they really need to be on so damn tight? Ouch.

Let the games begin.

25+3 day today. Last cervical U/S was 2 weeks ago. Had a lot of action the last two weeks. Nothing worth a call to the doctor--but lots of contractions and bits of bleeding here and there. I knew something was up.

So I was prepared for some bad news at my U/S today. When the tech first put the wand in, we both looked at the screen baffled. Where the hell is it? Where is my cervix? Not a good sign. We finally found it went the stitch became visible. That bugger dropped from 3.9 to 2.7-- which all in all, is not terrible. But not great either. Just to show off I had a contraction during the exam so the other measurements were even shorter. Gasp.

While the Peri's usually just get a call I get a report back fron the tech-- this time I got to see the Dr. They are like the Wizard 0f 0z only stepping out from behind the curtain when necessary. My misbehaving, show-off ute landed me in triage. Nice.

After countless trips there carrying the D-man, it is annoyingly familiar. The smells, the sounds, the equipment. They kept me for about 3 hours at which time I had NO contractions, gave me a steroid shot in the arse and sent me home. I have to go back tomorrow for another shot. I was not ordered on bedrest, but am supposed to take it easy. No heavy lifting. Not too much up and down the steps, whatever, whatever-- I know the drill.

I guess there is one thing I really can count on. My cervix is bunk.

Hopefully just a blip....

I was already nervous about this week. I am 24+3 and it is an OB-only, non-ultrasound week. I have been contracting a little. But nothing regular or painful.

So I had a speculum exam and my OB discovered some bleeding around the stitch. It was not enough to even cause a discharge. He applied a solution-- um, which I foolishly forgot to ask the purpose. My assumption would be it is a kind of antiseptic to keep away infection. He felt, from the manual exam, that I seemed to be holding up otherwise.

So my instructions are the usual. Call with bleeding or more than 6 contractions and hour. I am a little unnerved, but trying to hold it together. I have 1 week to go till another u/s. I am just going to try to take it easy.

23+4 and Holding Strong?

I am, well, baffled. This week last time around is when the shit hit the fan. I went into preterm labor and my cervical length began its great descend to nothingness. So when I arrived at my appointment yesterday I was pretty nervous.

I was hoping for my favorite U/S tech, but decided I would be happy with anyone other than the one I had last week. I got a woman I never met before. She was super confident, super fast and super efficient. I watched images of the girl flash on the screen. Head, body, kidney blood flow (yeah, looks like she has 2:) She is weighing in at 1lb 10 ounces already. Nice. Then onto the old cerv.

I watched the first measurement come up. I was expecting a number to toss me in the "scary yet still gray area" because that is how I roll. The numbers pop up in the lower right of the screen and I can't even always see the whole thing. But wouldn't you know: 3.9. What? I am holding strong? What? Me? I am totally baffled at this point. After the tech left the room, I balled. Relief, and continued fear.

I did start feeling an uptick in contractions this week, but nothing alarming. I guess the progesterone really is doing the trick. And this week will begin to tell us what happened last time around. I am starting to think the it was the PTL all along that started the ball rolling, not IC. Only time will tell.

But I can not ignore the pessimist in me who thinks: well, my dates could be off. Next week could be the bad week. And I don't have an U/S for 2 weeks, though I do see my OB next week. I forgot what this living week to week thing was like. Hoping to just make it one more. I remember thinking: if I can just get to 28 weeks, if I can just get to 30 weeks, if I can just get to 32 weeks-- then I'll feel ok, safe. But you never do till you get within a few weeks of term, do you?

22+2 with 2/10 cm loss

So my cervix went from 3.9 to 3.7. The u/s tech seemed a little lost. I watched her try to measure my length over and over. She didn't really seem to know what she was doing. So I am chalking up the very minor dip to her shaky hand.

I see my OB on friday for a spec and manual check. Then back for another u/s next friday at 23+4. The very same gestational where my cervix bailed last time. Could be interesting!

I am doing a terrible job of documenting my pregnancy. With D. I took pictures all the time. Here is the first one I took so far!

Love! Joy!

Little Boy Hank arrived yesterday. The son of one of my most favored blogger and real world friends. Go say a HUGE and much awaited congrats to G$ at Makes You Stronger! She will be one of the most glorious Mama's ever!

Not much to report from me. We just arrived home from a week at the beach. My garden is a disaster. Seems my tomatoes have contracted a fatal in incurable fungus. I am a gardening failure. My ego, as it pertains to keeping things alive, didn't really need a blow at this very moment. Whatever.

I have an U/S to check on my cervix and stitch tomorrow. I am just about 22 weeks, so I am anticipating there could be a little change this week, but hoping not. I have been having occasional very slight spotting. Really, just barely a bit of pink. I'll mention it to my Peri. I have also had a little spotting following exams (speculum and trans-vag u/s.) But I suppose that is pretty normal.